Who is The Happy Humiliatrix?

Who is The Happy Humiliatrix? Well, I am about get real with you! Oh, that got your attention, didn’t it? You boys are always trying to figure your Domme out, trust me I know. Let’s talk about the facts, puppet. What am I willing to reveal about myself to tickle your curiosity? Well, my name is Stesha but you may know me by other stages names such as “Eve”. I have been in the industry for a very long time just haunting every bad boy’s ass who thought he could out-wit me. In my personal life I play with BDSM too, if that matters to you.

I am quick witted and ready to go into verbal battle. You won’t win so don’t even bother to try. I love to joke around and my humour leans towards the really corny, at times. I am a real person and when you talk to me you will feel that authenticity. The Happy Humiliatrix domination experience should be tasted by all – unless all you want is JOI? Then maybe move on, ok? LMAO I say this with much love but I find telling you how to pull your weiner, for any length of time, mind numbing. It just bores me to tears, sorry. Like just stroke that damn thing and let’s talk about something else.

Phew, I feel better getting that off my chest. 😀

How Would I describe The Happy Humiliatrix?

I am a left handed weirdo who gets off on mind games and letting her wonderfully crazy side out to play. You get bonus points with me if you love horror movies and bad jokes. Yes, I own a strap on harness and yes, I know how to wield it.

I am incredibly artistic and I enjoy the visual beauty in life. I am a west coaster or the wet coast, as we call it. Your Goddess lives on a beautiful island in Canada with so much nature to soak in. I love it here and will never leave so stop trying to get me to shack up with you somewhere in the States. Im not interested and It’s not going to happen lol.

I am on Niteflirt but I rarely log into that site unless its an established regular calling. Goddess is super picky about NF and who calls me on there. I know, if you are an NF user, you know that they have many rules in their TOS and I follow them all. I find it a bit restrictive, tbh but its their site and their rules and I can, and do, respect that. This Domme wants to have more control over what I do so I advertise my toll free number on here instead. If you wish to discuss calling me on Niteflirt you can shoot me an email and we can discuss it but don’t be offended if I decide I would prefer you call me on my toll free line. Most likely, that will be the end result.

If you want to really get to know The Happy Humiliatrix you should follow me on twitter. Get on there and follow my crazy, wonderful, ass!

Why Pegging Phone Sex?

Why pegging phone sex, you might enquire? Well, because it feels good! It’s both physical and cerebral in its kinky pleasure. If you are a pegging fetish novice who fantasizes about a Mistress sticking anal sex toys up your ass what are you honestly waiting for? You wont regret stepping outside of your kinky comfort zone and even if you decide you don’t like it you can at least say you tried. I will say this, my personal experience is men love being penetrated by women! Of course, I am ridiculously amazing with butt plugs and strapons!

Craving Pegging Phone Sex Does Not Automatically Make You Gay

Let me make this clear. If you dream of a Mistress in a strap on cock harness that does not make you gay. There is nothing wrong with being gay at all but this is the one whiny complaint I have heard when a slave refuses to even entertain the idea of anything (even a finger) in his ass. Please, let this notion go. Its silly. Straight, gay, bi etc.. all men can all enjoy anal! If the sight of a glorious Goddess with a cock strapped on scares you that much you are on the wrong site.

This Mistress loves strapping a cock on and having my wicked way with you! Same goes with guided anal training. Do you have butt plugs that you like to play with while you serve your phone Domme? Lets get them out and let me guide you through an anal training session! I like to go slow and build up the submissive pleasure because, lets face it, it feels so damn good you will fall in love with me. You will want to experience it again and again. Enslaving you with every tool, rubber or otherwise, is my personal specialty.

3 Reasons Why My Strap On Cock is Better Than Yours

It’s bigger then your penis. This is a duh one, but I want to talk about it anyways. My cock will always be bigger than your cock. Why would I have a smaller one? That’s rhetorical, so don’t bother trying to justify that. I know you wish I had a dainty one to make you feel more manly, but get real. If we had a game of swords my dick would knock your dick into the dirt and laugh at it.

I never premature ejaculate. I can outlast your ass every time! My dick loves to keep going long after you squirt. Well, that’s if I let you squirt. As a matter of fact, I like to keep fucking you while your limp dick flaps around between your legs. That really makes you feel like a bitch boy, doesn’t it? Its so humiliating! Premature ejaculation automatically makes you a weak ass no matter how big you say your cock is, btw.

When it comes to pegging sex I am the bomb! I could out-fuck you every single time. I could steal your girlfriend if I decided I wanted her. My dick is that bad-ass!

Let’s not discount the cerebral aspect of serving a pegging fetish Mistress. What better way to get inside your head and own you? Having me rubber balls deep in that ass pussy, making you my bitch, has a way of eliminating whats left of your male ego and showing you the true meaning of your existence. You were put here to entertain me and you better do a good job of it!

Small Penis Humiliation Phone Sex

In the produce aisle this afternoon I was thinking about the different types of small penis humiliation phone sex types there are. I guess buying zucchini, eggplant, green beans, and carrots can make a Mistress’ mind wander? I check out dudes in the produce aisle, and I just know when they have a small cock. Mistress definitely has small dick radar. Must be emasculating touching all those big veggies knowing your cock is way smaller! Anyways, in every sexual fetish there are varying degrees on the kinky scale. Trust me, no tiny cock caller is better than the next – you are all pitiful, but there are definitely certain stereotypes. Lets see which box you fit into. HA, I just made a funny. You can fit into any box with lots of room to spare LOL. I’m just brutally honest, aren’t I?

The Average Size 5 Inch or 6 Inch Cock type:

These guys kill me! Like, in someways, they are even funnier than the little button dick dudes. When you inquire as to their cock size they will immediately, and often with a tinge of pride, tell you that they aren’t that small, they are average. Often 5 or 6 inches. Trust me you won’t have to ask them twice about their dick size, unlike their smaller peers who are shy and toeing the carpet when you ask them how small their cock is. They have deluded themselves into thinking that their calls are just a domination fantasy because, hey, they aren’t that small, they are average.

Lmao, give me a moment here. This just kills me and makes me bust a gut laughing! This cock mocking Goddess won’t let them delude themselves any longer! I mean get real, dude! No hot lady on the face of this planet has said, OMG, I had the best pussy pounding from an average size cock last night. Your dick is still way too small to impress anyone. Let me repeat, “you are still too small for this ride”. Here is another hint you are way off track, hand humper. How many average sized, penis shaped, insertion sex toys sell like hot cakes? None, that’s how many.

The 3 to 4 Inch Small Penis Humiliation Phone Sex Weeny 

This beat off addict still thinks he’s a man, but is he really? He certainly isn’t a man but he tries and that’s very cute. I know that’s not very complimentary, but its true. Cute and laughable all at once. It’s embarrassing to have a Mistress laugh at you, isn’t it? Listen, your flick stick is not sexually awe inspiring. No woman’s mouth is watering when you pull down your drawers. As a matter of fact, I suspect her mouth and pussy will dry up like the Sahara desert. Then comes the giggling. You can’t be serious with that thing. Seriously, you can’t.

How many women have been a victim to your “surprise” in the bedroom? The peels of laughter and some serious contemplation of her own little wiener radar is a more likely reaction, right? You are a very naughty small penis humiliation phone sex caller and we both know it. Being embarrassed is all you deserve, dick pincher, and you should be punished! 

The 1 to 3 Inch Teeny Weeny Micro Penis Type

This caller already knows there is no convincing you that they have anything but an ugly, hairy, button between their legs. The hair is longer than their actual skin tag of a dick, LOL! They accept their fate and their place in your dominant world. I happen to love all the whining and pleading this kinky SPH type does on a itty bitty clitty call. In a way you have to feel a little sorry for them. Cold water is their kryptonite, they look like a Ken-doll in boxers and panties make them leak, constantly. Not much of a tent you are pitching there, huh jerk off monkey? 

Well, wait, you don’t jerk off because that would imply you have something to grab onto, ha! I guess you are truly just a hand humper. Maybe, if you trimmed your pubes we could actually find that hard teat. Yuck! Not the most attractive look but it could be worse. It could be cold out and that teeny weeny could be mistaken for a belly button. See, The Happy Humiliatrix always finds a positive for you addicted wankers and you know that isn’t easy to do. 

To Conclude My Small Penis Humiliation Phone Sex Blog

Of course, there will be some cross over and these types are not set in stone, but they are definitely out there looking for the perfect cock mocking Mistress to tease them. One more type I will mention is the one who at the end of their domination session will tell you that they really have a big fat 8 inch dick, and this is just a fantasy. LMAO, yeah right and I am the Queen of England. Well, I am the Queen of SPH in your tiny world, grunt.

Humiliation Phone Sex

My personal kink is humiliation phone sex! I enjoy the cerebral aspect of what I do. Digging deep into your submissive psyche to find out what sexual fetish makes you embarrassed and aroused at the same time makes my chosen profession exciting. Its actually interesting that your sexual secrets are humiliating, but also turn you on, no? The fact that you have a small penis, like to wear women’s clothing, or premature ejaculate and can still jack off, while this mistress taunts you, is the bees knees for The Happy Humiliatrix. Of course, that pitiful boner isn’t on the same page as your male ego, is it? Its not smart enough to be ashamed. It’s too busy spitting up all that nasty goo. You can bet your booty you will be cleaning that up too. Yeah, I love giving CEI, too.

As matter of fact, part of my job is to chip away at that male ego, and on some of you it isn’t that big to begin with. Kind of like your dick, ha! It’s titillating to the shame-filled addict to confess what makes them unworthy of pussy. That’s what it boils down to. Unlike your bro’s, who are more than willing to shower at the gym, wear tight swim shorts, or flirt with women that are out of your league, you would never have the balls to do any of those things. You just stand in the corner watching all your buds get all the hot tail.

Humiliation Phone Sex Topics we Can Discuss?

  • Verbal Humiliation – probably my favorite form of embarrassing you. I am a rather cheeky Domme. My submissive boy’s love my my endless teasing. The taunts just keep coming when you call me, I promise. I also love to laugh and have a captivating voice that is supremely feminine. It’s also both sexy and humiliating.
  • Small Penis Humiliation – This falls under the umbrella of verbal taunting, but is more specific as its about your teeny weenie. Boy, does this Goddess love cock mocking! I just focus on making you whimper while you divulge all your awkward, sexual, confessions, and real life stories about your your tiny member. Women have laughed at it. I know I’m going to, too. Just whisper your admissions of heinous small penis crimes into my ear, ha! This humiliatrix does enjoy the conversation, so please, don’t be shy. I want you to actually talk with me. Understanding where you are coming from makes for a better domination session, and you definitely want that, right? This stands for every kind of call l I do.
  • Premature Ejaculation – You can be a premature ejaculator whether you have a big dick or a small wiener. If you have a large cock its actually a true atrocity to cum so damn quickly. Why? Its a waste of some major meat! What a disappointment. If you are at the other end of the kinky spectrum its just one more embarrassment to heap upon you, isn’t it? At least, with some training, PE can be fixed but you can’t fix a teeny weenie, ha! Tugging on your cock like a jackrabbit isn’t something to brag about. This isn’t a race, you know! If you are first to the finish line YOU are the loser.
  • Public Play – Do you love to wear ladies panties to work? Would it be emasculating for your female co-workers to see your panty line? You know they are giggling about you around the water cooler, right? Or, how about shopping and trying on lingerie or clothes in an upscale shop for women? What about a big cum spot in your trousers while trying to flirt with a lady in a bar? Or, getting caught blowing a guy in the men’s bathroom at another bar. So many different ways to take away your chance of ever scoring pussy, right?
  • Wearing Women’s Clothing – Are you into cross dressing or feminization? You don’t have to be into humiliation phone sex if you are into either fetish but for this particular post I am going to focus on the topic of this blog. If you are the perfect candidate you definitely love to be transformed into the ultimate bimbo. It could just involve panties and high heels, or it could involve the full meal deal! Female items like stockings, garters, panties, a dress, falsies, make up, and every other slutty detail I can come up with during a call can be yours! Maybe, you would love to be taunted about sucking cock? I bet you are a sloppy, slutty cock sucker! Or, being made to jerk off for all my lady friends while we tease you for stroking your big clitty? I know how much you crave a sexy female audience that’s laughing at you.

I want to know what makes you self conscious? So many of you fetish callers are turned on by what makes your cheeks burn. Go ahead and blush for your Goddess. It’s totally anonymous and the my phone line is the perfect confessional box. As you can see there are many forms of mocking we can enjoy. Maybe, you have another humiliating idea you want me to verbally taunt you about? You can confess everything when you get on the phone with me tonight!

Feminization Phone Sex

There are many feminization phone sex lovers who hide the fact that they love women’s apparel from everyone, even their wife. Its their guilty pleasure and they don’t need to sashay out of the girly closet, if they don’t want to. You don’t have to be shy around this Mistress, though. I want to celebrate creating the new and feminine you! I pay attention to every glittery detail of your transformation, darling.

To start with we need to do any waxing that might be needed. Then you may have a luxurious bubble bath while I set out all the pretty lingerie I want to dress you up in. When you get out of the tub I am going to pop some bubbly. Nothing makes a girl feel more girly than champagne and lingerie on a feminization phone sex call! Lets start with these see-through tulle panties, with black lace and frills on each hip. So coquettish! Then you are going to gently roll up some Cuban heel, silk, stockings. Go slow, my pretty pet. Rolling up such delicate stockings cannot be rushed. Enjoy the sensuality of it all. Don’t deny the tactile part of you the pleasure of such a feminine act.

Next up are the 8 strap satin garters and a pair of high heels of my choosing of course. I love dressing my hot sluts in 6 inch stilettos with a 2 inch platform. Don’t worry about being able to walk in them because the truth is its not a necessary skill. I also chose this sexy black brocade corset that is going to cinch in your waist and give you an hour glass figure. I also think black satin opera gloves would complete this outfit!

After that comes the make up and a curly blonde or red long haired wig. Why all this effort for a feminization phone sex session? Well it all depends on what we do next. There is always a next. No girl gets dressed up to the nines and just stays home alone. Well I guess I could tell you how to masturbate with your satin gloved hand. That could be kinky and sensual all at once. But there is also a strap on session available to complete ones night or maybe you are feeling quite kinky and want to take a trip to the fantasy glory hole! I know some of you love cock sucking. Actually, I know more about you then you think, girly boy. *wink*

SPH Phone Sex

Calling all of my SPH phone sex dick pinchers! If you are an embarrassed member of The Happy Humiliatrix’s Little Dicky Brigade then this blog is for you! No tugging those micro penises though! Not until you have paid your cum dues. This means you call my toll free number and please your Royal Highness with a phone session. You heard right. Not just enough to cover your jack rabbit tugging session. We all know that doesn’t take very long and I am not a 1 minute, 2 pump chump, kinda mistress. You are calling to serve and amuse me, not your yucky cocktail wiener. This takes way longer than a couple of minutes, so hands off that crotch pimple until I say so!

‘Some of you tiny dick callers can’t handle my sexy voice . You tickle those ugly balls, I giggle, and you are already dribbling! If you want me to remember you then you have to play the game my way. Tease and denial is one of my favourite ways to relax and have a good time. Yeah, I know it’s at your expense and cost, but I wouldn’t have it any other way, hand humper! It’s not like you can put that credit card away and simply forget about me. Once this Femdom gets under your skin you will not forget me. I am a Goddess whose power cannot be denied.

SPH phone sex and blue balls pair well, don’t you think?

I’m going to laugh at your begging to tickle your wiener. I won’t let you premature ejaculating dick-weeds masturbate until you have grovelled sufficiently, and we always run the risk of some titillating tease and denial fun just to prolong your little cock’s sexual agony. I certainly won’t be bumping my perfect pussy against that ugly little dick. You better drop that delusional fantasy and accept your embarrassing fate, dick flicker.

When it comes to humiliating acronyms SPH is one of the very best! This salty Mistress knows how embarrassing it is to expose yourself to my taunting voice. That’s truly part of the fun for this mean Humiliatrix. My laugh is like a siren’s luring you into unveiling every emasculating detail about your junk. I want to hear those woeful confessions surrounding the lack of of length and girth of your winky. How many women have busted a genuine giggle at your minuscule member? 

Your secrets will remain secrets with this verbally mocking Domina. Well okay, I might tell some of my girlfriends. I actually have a little trouble keeping secrets because they are often so damn fun to spill! Don’t worry, they won’t tell their friends about your lack of sexual prowess, I promise. Well, I can’t totally promise.

SPH stands for small penis Humiliation. I am sure you already know that, but for the uninitiated that is the meaning of the kinky acronym. I do have a burning question for you, though. Are your balls tiny too? Or do you have ridiculously big balls that your little pecker can rest on. I find both very amusing. A small penis on big balls is ridiculously funny and small balls are just as pathetic as your pint sized cock. You simply can’t win with The Happy Humiliatrix. I am going to keep bopping a long finding boner inducing things that are funny about your cock and balls. I am a cheeky force to be reckoned with! If you want to confess your dickless sins to womankind give me a call!